My birthday is coming up this month. I love my birthday and make a point to have a great time with family. We have living room dance parties, I grab lunch with my mom and maybe go antiquing with friends. Coffee and donuts are always involved. Whatever the agenda, the whole day’s focus is gratitude for God giving me life and in living that life to the fullest.

This happens with every birthday at the Sciba house, complete with a modest list of hoped-for gifts—although my grown-up birthday list contains more time than things. Time for a date with my husband (paired with babysitting); focused time with one or two children so I can experience them without distraction; time to step away for coffee with a friend; or just time to relax alone at home. In my heart, the possibilities are endless. The above wishes no longer resemble my wants from 20, or even five, years ago. They are desires that material possessions couldn’t satisfy.

Time is at the top of the Lord’s wish list, too. More time with and from us. Time in the quiet of adoration and Mass; mindfulness of Him in our work, parenting and marriages; time in prayerful conversation to know Him more deeply. What does this look like practically?

Begin with prayer. St. Therese said, “Prayer is a launching out of the heart toward God.” Jesus wants us in whatever state we find ourselves—from apathetic, angry, wounded and confused, to grateful or on top of the world. He is here for it and wants us in the raw. To present ourselves honestly to the Father then receive His grace in return is life-giving, and fruit will come from it.

Practice lectio divina with the daily readings; go to Mass, the source and summit of our faith; journal in Adoration. Drawing close to God and recalling with increasing frequency that He is ever-present and working right there with us will yield steady confidence and abiding joy.

Then serve the least of your brethren. My closest branch of Catholic Charities makes monthly visits to the most destitute, so my kids and I are going along to help. Next week, we will spend a day distributing food, household goods and personal items to beautiful souls who humbly depend on such work. I want so much for this to be a regular commitment from our family so we can be channels of the Lord’s provision, yet encounter Him more deeply in each person we meet.

Make a point to seek out opportunities for serving in your own parish or larger area, and don’t hesitate to make a gift of yourself to these efforts.

St. Teresa of Calcutta said that the greatest poverty in the world is a lack of love. Be a shoulder for someone grieving and a friend to the neglected and overlooked, maybe in your own home. Does your spouse have overlooked struggles? Is one of your kids getting picked on by a sibling? Go where love is most needed and ask Jesus to use you.

Our lives are meant to be conduits of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit. There’s a common misconception that to be holy is to be robbed of whatever makes us us; that we’ll somehow be deprived of the things we like or do, or of happiness in general. But it’s simply not true. In giving time to our Lord through prayer and service, we become not only more like Him, but also more authentically ourselves. We realize concretely who we were made to be.

Katie Sciba is a national speaker and Catholic Press Award- winning columnist. Katie has been married for 15 years and is blessed with six children.

This article appeared in the January 2024 edition of The Catholic Telegraph Magazine. For your complimentary subscription, click here.