In nature, young wolves leave their birth packs to assert independence but to find new territory and a mate. Their time as “lone wolves” is a temporary phase, a bridge to renewed life in community. Prolonged solitude, however, spells danger. Without a pack, wolves face starvation, disease and diminished survival odds.
While wolves that survive to adulthood endure only a brief solitude, many humans today, especially men, willingly adopt the “lone wolf” mentality. They believe strength, self-reliance and freedom are only attainable in isolation and thus wall themselves off from others’ demands, protecting their time, energy and emotions. Like wolves, however, humans live too long in isolation, the consequences are severe. Without others’ perspectives, minor worries magnify into paralyzing fears, and harmful mental patterns take hold, warping how we see the world. The lone wolf mentality may begin as a form of self-protection, but a life spent guarding against others inevitably ends up guarding against God.

This hyper-individualistic mindset directly contradicts our very nature as beings created for connection—with God and with each other. Jesus Himself exemplified a deeply relational way of life in His earthly ministry, marked by constant fellowship with His disciples. His first miracle—turning water into wine at the wedding feast of Cana—affirmed the joy and necessity of shared life (Jn. 2:1-12). The disciples were only ever alone when, giving into fear, they abandoned Jesus (Mt. 26:56). And when they went on mission, Jesus sent them out in pairs (Mk 6:7-13). Today, this communal principle is reflected in the lives of monks, who live in brotherhood—even religious hermits have spiritual directors and often go to daily Mass at a local parish.

It is true that solitude, for a limited time, can be a healthy part of the Christian journey. We might start to grow in our spirituality, to pick up new habits and leave old ones that distance us from our former social “pack.” There will also be those times when we simply feel alone, no matter who’s around us.
On the Cross, Jesus gave voice to this feeling of isolation, crying out, “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?” (Mt. 27:46). Yet even in His agony, He was not abandoned. An angel strengthened Him in the Garden of Gethsemane (Lk. 22:43), Simon of Cyrene helped Him carry His cross (Lk. 23:26), and at Golgotha, His mother and the beloved disciple stood faithfully by His side (Jn. 19:26-27).

These moments reveal a profound truth: even when we feel alone, we are never truly alone. God is present in our suffering, often working through others to support and strengthen us.

When we find ourselves in a time of isolation, the Church offers us a path back to communion. The Sacraments draw us into the Body of Christ, reminding us that we belong not just to ourselves but to each other. We also have opportunities to join men’s or women’s groups, volunteer our service and attend retreats. These experiences provide the necessary time and space to form friendships centered in shared growth, joy and consolation. The Church is our spiritual pack, where we discover our true strength, purpose and belonging.

Rudyard Kipling once wrote, “The strength of the pack is the wolf, and the strength of the wolf is the pack.” This wisdom echoes God’s design for humanity. A culture that romanticizes the lone wolf archetype leads only to a heavy silence, where anxiety and despair easily take root. God calls us to something much greater: to love and be loved in the Body of Christ.

Colin Rahill is the Director of Digital Engagement for the Archdiocese of Cincinnati, as well as an author and speaker. | [email protected].

This article appeared in the March 2025 edition of The Catholic Telegraph Magazine. For your complimentary subscription, click here.